


Skyfall.

by skyblue993



Series: Jonnor oneshots [37]
Category: The Fosters (TV 2013)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Connor got shot, Feels, Jonnor - Freeform, M/M, School's shooting, post 3x17
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-05
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-07-12 05:09:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7086667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyblue993/pseuds/skyblue993
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Skyfall is where we start<br/>A thousand miles and poles apart<br/>Where worlds collide and days are dark."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Skyfall.

**Author's Note:**

> TItle of this work by the (AMAZING) Song "Skyfall" By Adele.

 

 _"This is the end_  
_Hold your breath and count to ten"_

Connor Stevens had always been kind-hearted. He was the most selfless person Jude Adam Foster had ever met and when Connor's mom called him, the previous day on the verge of tears, Jude nearly had a heart attack.

She kept crying over the phone, her words muffed by the sobs escaping her lips were making it very hard to catch was she was trying to say. “J-Jude. Connor... he- Oh God.”

“M-Mrs Stevens, Something happened with Connor?”  
“H- Hospital.” then there was a long heavy silence filled by Connor's mom uneven breaths. “You have to come here, Jude. Please.” Connor's mother hang up the phone after that, leaving Jude with eyes blown wide and his phone still pressed to his ear. Obviously when he told his moms what happened they immediately agreed to take him to LA, they were worried themself since Connor had always been like a son to them.

“Jude.. it's gonna be okay.” His mom would say but Jude had this awful forebolding creeping through his chest that made it very hard to breathe.

Jude spent the whole car ride in complete silence. “You should get some sleep honey.” Stef said, throwing a concerned look at Jude over the rierview mirror.

“I'll try.” Jude replied but as soon as he closed his eyes, awful images of Connor's lifeless body laying in a hospital bed started flowling behind his closed eyelids.

_He dreamed about Connor laying in a coffin, his friends and family gathered around giving him their last goodbyes._

_He was just standing there, looking down at his boyfriend ,–ex boyfriend-- his mind corrected him, in a catatonic state; he couldn't move a muscle and even though  Jude was internally screaming and crying about his loss, from the outside Jude was as lifeless as Connor._

_Somehow he finally snapped back into reality as he reached for his hand, It felt cold as ice into his own. Jude's voice sounded raw and consumed as he started calling him softly. “Connor.” Connor wasn't replying. “Con..” Still nothing. “Connor!” Everyone was looking at him with wide eyes as he took few steps forward, laying against the coffin the edge in his voice increasing as he started shooking Connor's coffin. “Connor! Wake up!”_

“ _Honey..” Lena was trying to pull him backwards, away from that painful sight, but Jude kept screaming against her chest. “Con! Open your eyes! Con!” Connor kept peacefully 'sleeping' instead, that's what His brain kept telling him. Connor was just sleeping, he couldn't... he couldn't be..” Con...C-”_

“No.No!” His eyes snapped open as he woke up panting and crying. Stef and Lena were looking at him with wide eyes, pain written all over their faces as they tried to reassure Jude that everything was going to be fine.

“ _Please be okay.. please, be okay.”_

 

Jude's heart nearly stopped beating when Connor's mom hugged him when she met him outside-- of what Jude assumed was-- Connor's room.

“Jude!” Her pain was clearly visible across her features as he held him tightly. “Oh Jude.”  
“What happened?” Her arms wrapped a bit tighter around his shoulders and when she pulled away from their embrace and Jude could take a more careful look at the woman. She was a mess. Her face was clean from any sign of make up, she was pale and Jude saw exhaustation flashing across her eyes. Jude felt his heart clenching at the sight because she didn't resemble the smiling woman picking up Connor from Jude's house when the moment of his move came. She didn't seemed the polite, warm woman hugging him while he was bawling his eyes out, telling him that she was proud of Connor and happy that he'd find a boy so wonderful in his life.

“There has been a shooting at C-Connor's school.” She explained, fighting back tears. “Someone had a gun.. and T-this person threatened to shoot. C-Connor was just trying to protect a frightened girl and He-...”  
“No.” Jude shook his head in denial. It couldn't have been.. he refused to believe it.  
“Oh, Honey..” Jude released a loud gasp, feeling his knees giving out.  Alison crouched down next to him, pulling Jude into her arms. “He got shot.” Jude hugged her back, crying uncontrollably against her shirt, soaking it with tears. “I-I'm sorry.” Alison smiled softly, shaking her head. “It's okay..”  
“You want to see him?" Jude didn't need to be told twice. He nodded, following her into Connor's room.

 As soon as he stepped next to Connor's bed, he felt his breath catching in his throat at the sight of the blond boy – his best friend, his (ex) boyfriend, his everything..-  laying peacefully on the mattress.

"H-He's in a Coma." Alison explained with trembling voice until it broke into a sob. "I-I'll leave you alone. I need some air." She walked away, still sobbing as she closed the door behind her.

Jude knew It was highly unlikely that he would have woken up just listening to his voice, But it didn't stop him from trying. He sat down on the chair placed next to Connor's bed, feeling a shiver running down his spine when he gently took Connor's hand. It was cold. Connor had never been that cold. The most amazing thing about Connor was his warmth. Jude felt a soft smile tugging up at the corner of his lips, Remembering one time when he was cold and it just took Connor's warm body against his chest to make him feel warm and loved. Connor was just that: Warm and loving, and Jude suddenly felt like he had no right to be in that room with him. 

"Hey.. Connor." He inhaled deeply as he held Connor's hand a bit tighter in his own. "I know I'm not warm as you.. But I'm doing my best, okay? If you were awake you would have probably shivered before shifting away from your _popsicle_."

Jude smiled at the memory of that nickname. "That's how you've always called me, remember? I've never been into nicknames, You know I much I hate when Mariana calls me 'Judicorn' but when you've said it for the first time.. I don't know, It was so cute and I couldn't stop smiling. You've always done that, Con. You always make me smile." Even though Jude didn't want to cry in Connor's presence, he couldn't fight the tears quickly running down his cheeks, falling copiously on Connor's cold hand.

"You know, I've never felt you so cold  and it's scary.. Because you've always kept me warm Con, even when I was nothing but a cold hearted little bitch to you." Jude raised one of his hand, wiping undernath his eyes. "I still remember how hurt I've been by your words, Connor. But you know that? After all we've been through I realize that you were right all along. I feel like I don't deserve to be in this room with you after all the pain I've put you through but I refuse to go, not until I'm sure that you'll be alright." Jude sighed, taking a deep breaths before holding Connor's hand in his own, caressing his palm with circular movements of his thumb. "I want to watch those kind, gentle eyes opening even if they won't ever look at me in the same way and you just open them to glare at me... it's okay Connor, I totally deserve it, but please wake up."

Jude's eyes fluttered close, unable to look at Connor without having million of memories flowing through his mind a mile a minute. He took Connor's hand in his, kissing his knuckles before gently resting it on his cheek like Connor had always done to him, referring to it as porcelain skin. He would have kissed him on the cheek before slowly trailng downwards towards his lips. Jude's gaze fell on Connor's dry lips bringing a painful yet heartmelting memory back to the surface. Jude felt a soft blush creeping over his cheeks as he spoke.

"I'll never forget our first kiss. I've experienced every kind of "first time" with you, you know? You have been my _first_ friend, I've had my _first_ kiss with you, and then You turned my world upside down and I'm sorry if I never had the guts to open up like this to you and I'm aware that I should have done this ages ago but I'm hopeful that somehow you can hear me Con, because I don't know if I would have the courage of saying these words out loud while looking in your eyes, not after how I treated you. You're so kind that you would probably even forgive me, because you're like that, Connor, You wear your heart on your sleeve and I was too wrapped on myself and my issues to give you credit for that.”

"I still remember when you asked if I wanted to be yours. You weren't exactly subtle, young man." Jude let out a sad laugh, looking down at the boy. "... But it made me so happy that I've found you as friend, Never imagining that you would have become such an essential person in my life. I'm aware that telling you all of this while you're laying in a hospital bed is an epic coward move but please, Forgive me for every single time I've taken you for granted; Forgive me for devaluing our relationship and what that meant for the both of us." Jude bit his lips fighting the urge to burst our in tears once again. "I just want you to know that I've never meant what I've said during that stupid Skype video chat; I didn't fall for you because we were the only two gay kids in our grade, I fell in love with you because when I'm with you I can be myself without feeling the weight of labels, knowing that you would still be proud of me. I fell in love with you because you make me feel like I could fight against the whole world and I would find you fighting it with me. I fell in love with you because when you kissed me for the first time, I felt the whole world freezing around us; There was just you, me and the sound of our hearts beating like they never had before. I fell in love with you because you're impossible not to love." Jude took few deep breaths, catching on his breath before telling Connor.

"No one would have done half of the things you've done for me and I'd been nothing but ungrateful towards you. First the Maddie thing, then the 'No labels' thing, then I've broken both our hearts And you still were the most supportive boyfriend I've could ever wish for. You maybe won't believe me Con, but I've never meant to hurt you.. You are --hands down-- the boy I would want to spend my days with, and I know We're young and the future is unknown but I want to figure it out with you, rather than be apart from you. I'm sorry if I've been such a dick. I really love you Connor.” Connor's hand felt still cold against his lips as he laid a soft kiss on it. “ I love you and I'm willing to do everything to win your trust back, if you think there still a chance for us and If you're willing to forgive me for my mistakes and giving me the opportunity to show you how grateful I am for having you as my boyfriend.” His eyes were filled with tears as he told Connor. “I'll totally understand if you're not willing to try again.. in that case I'll leave you alone but please, Connor I'm begging you, just wake up." His throat felt raw and dry as he sobbed, hiding his face into the soft mattress and still holding Connor's hand into his own. When Jude finally drifted off to sleep He felt like his whole body was drained out of energy but despite that, being still able to hold Connor's hand was giving him the strenght to be strong and _hope_ , _pray_ for Connor to wake up.

 

_"Feel the earth move and then_

_Hear my heart burst again_  "

 

Jude slowly opened his eyes as he felt voices and footsteps rushing inside of the room. His gaze fell on Connor's mom, sitting right next to him, with a huge smile on her face.

He forgot for a split second where he was and what was he doing there but suddenly everything came flooding back to his memories; _Shooting. Hospital. Connor!_

His heart leapt. “C-Con.” Connor was awake and He was smiling softly at him. Jude looked down, realizing that his hand was still intertwined with Connor's.

Connor lifted up his hand, carefully avoiding to dislodge it from Jude's, as he wiped away the falling tears off Jude's face.

“Hey.” Jude finally felt a smile tugging up at the corner of his lips. Connor was awake. Connor was smiling. His Connor was back. “Con I-.”  
Connor's raw voice cut him off as he tightened his grip around Jude's fingers. “I know.” Connor was still too weak to speak but the smile he gave Jude in return indicated that they were gonna get through it. They would have faced it together, _at skyfall._

 


End file.
